Embody Your Energy

67. Finding Fulfilment Beyond Societal Expectations with Johnny Seifert

• Charlotte Carter

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Ever felt like you're juggling society's expectations while trying to figure out who you really are? My guest for this episode, Johnny Seifert, has been there.  Through raw stories of finding support in unexpected places, he shows us how embracing life's plot twists can actually deepen our connections and help us value ourselves more.

After getting the boot from his job, this former radio host, showbiz pro, and sociology whiz didn't just bounce back – he evolved. With the kind of honesty that really makes you stop and take note, Johnny opens up about the messy parts of reinvention and the whole "what now?" moment we all dread.

The chat gets real about the exhausting chase for validation (we've all done it) and dives deep into love languages and those pesky insecurities we try to hide. We cover dating too – the whole beautiful mess of staying open while knowing your worth. And get this – Johnny managed to snag a mortgage as a freelancer, proving that sometimes life's got your back when you least expect it.

We wrap things up with some soul food for thought: the power of being present and finding closure. Johnny's got this great story about reconciliation that'll hit you right in the feels, plus some game-changing book recommendations for anyone looking to level up their mental health game.


CONNECT WITH JOHNNY

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/johnnyseifert/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@johnnyseifert92
Johnny's Secure The Insecure podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/secure-the-insecure/id1456512733

Johnny's book recommendations:
The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer
Think Like A Monk by Jay Shetty

CONNECT WITH CHARLOTTE

Website: https://www.idaretoleap.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamcharlottecarter
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/idaretoleap

7 Day Experience (starting 6th January 2025): https://idaretoleap.com/lp/activate-and-claim-your-path-to-success-for-2025

ULTRA (Charlotte's signature programme): https://idaretoleap.com/services/ultra

Interested in working with Charlotte? Schedule your free no-obligation call here:
https://api.leadconnectorhq.com/widget/bookings/charlottescalendar

Speaker 1:

Welcome to Becoming Fearless, the personal growth podcast for you if you are ready to overcome fear and step into your greatness. Our purpose is to help you overcome your limits, have loads of fun along the way, unlocking your fullest potential in life, business, health and relationships every single day. I'm your host, charlotte Carter, a high performance coach and entrepreneur with over 20 years experience. I'm your host, charlotte Carter, a high-performance coach and entrepreneur with over 20 years experience. I've supported many highly driven, talented people like you who dream big and are ready to take action to overcome what's holding them back. Each week, my guests and I will be sharing hacks and habits on how to build self-belief, courage and confidence, to master your mindset and navigate your emotions so that you can reach your human potential in a way that feels light, fun and easeful and helps you become fearless. Let's go.

Speaker 1:

Welcome everyone to another episode of Becoming Fearless. Today, I'm bringing to your ears a really, really, uh, epic person on multiple levels. This guy I met probably about seven or eight months ago at an event that I was speaking at and he was attending as well, and the event was about 70 or 80 people in the room and we were both on stage at different times, sharing different parts of our journey in different ways. And when I first met Johnny, I was like, yeah, let's bring him on because there is a multitude of topics we can talk about, which, as you keep listening, you will see, because it will unfold in the way that it's meant to, because it's very much a trust the process episode. So, johnny, do you want to let people know a little bit about you and what you were doing on that stage?

Speaker 2:

Thank you so much for having me, sean. I'm a big fan of the podcast. It's an honour to be here. It's an interesting question of what am I, and it's a question I'm focusing on at the moment quite a lot with identity. I got made redundant from a couple of roles. So I have been the show presenter for a national radio station for nine years.

Speaker 2:

I've been a radio producer for over a decade, and then roles start changing and then you go well, who am I? And I was on a date in October and someone said and the girl said to me what do you do? And I said well, I don't know how to tell you that because I've been made redundant, so I feel like I've lost my identity. So you could say to me yeah, and it's funny because when I talk to, let's say, someone who's done Love Island, and you go well, you did love island 10 years ago, but you're like yes, but you're an ex love islander. You're a love islander.

Speaker 2:

Um, I suppose I'm a showbiz editor, I'm a radio producer, I'm a podcaster, I'm a sociology tutor, I'm a mentor, I'm a coach. You know there's lots of hats I wear and I suppose it's when you think about that. It's like. Well, what defines you the most? And for me, it's being a storyteller. I'm there to tell your story, I'm there to share a story and I'm there to just inspire, educate, entertain, but take a step back and take perspective always and let's talk about your story, because there's a piece around mental health and well-being.

Speaker 1:

There's a piece around who you are in yourself relationship to yourself, relationship to your mind, relationship to other people, relationship to societal expectations. So let's talk about the story of you that you feel called to share.

Speaker 2:

I'll tell you anything you want to know. Where do you want to start?

Speaker 1:

Let's start from you as five years old.

Speaker 2:

So I have always said when you're in school it defines who you are as a person all the way through life until you die, because that's what moulds you. You'll notice a lot of the people in their 20s and 30s who are very good looking were probably quite large, probably bullied as a child and they've had to adapt. I was never in either category. I was always straight down in the middle. I was always friends with the popular people and friends with the less popular people. The popular people I always worshipped almost like celebrities. I remember one of the most beautiful girls in my year at school. I remember this so clearly going her, seeing her in school would never say hello and I remember she smiled at me and I remember getting home and messaging her age 12 on MSN and going thank you so much for smiling at me at school today and it made my day that she'd smiled at me and so I always wanted their approval. But also I knew they liked me for me. But I didn't like me for me and I think it's.

Speaker 2:

I've had to do a lot of self-development and a lot of work to go. You are okay being you. You are okay being vulnerable and, for example, being made redundant. Last week I put an Instagram post out and I said look, I'm really sorry to be vulnerable, but I've lost my job. Anyone who can help me, help me.

Speaker 2:

And the amount of comments and likes I got from what one will consider back in the day popular or celebrities, who've all got the blue tits and like big household names that we all know, and I'm like, oh my God, people really care. And I've got loads of messages saying thank you for being vulnerable and I've always given myself a lot of pride that I am so vulnerable and I'm so honest and I'm an open book. But I suppose there's still a filter that's in place, because, not, I don't care about what the status quo is, but there's certain elements that you want to keep back. So it's just always making sure that you're comfortable with what you're putting out there and then what you're holding back that actually could be out there or not, but I think it's so important to help people. I got made redundant. Four other people did. Those other four people have now come forward and said since, I also got made redundant, but they would never have done that had it not been for my Instagram post.

Speaker 1:

So do you see yourself as being a leader?

Speaker 2:

Absolutely, and I think you're born a leader or you're born not a leader. So anything I do in life is being a leader either it's inspiring, it's leading a team, it's leading yourself. You know, I think there's a lot of people who have that dependency that they need a partner to depend on and they need someone who's going to tell them this is the restaurant we're going to, this is the time. I'm that born leader. That's going to go right.

Speaker 1:

Come with me, I'm going to take you on that journey let's talk about the fears that you've overcome in the leadership, self-leadership piece, because I feel like there's a lot of people that listen to this podcast from various walks of life, very, very successful in different pockets of time. So some are wildly rich in the financial sense, some are wildly rich in the love sense, some are wildly rich in the business and fulfillment sense. A lot of people struggle to think that they can have it all, and that's where I think self-leadership comes in, because you can have whatever you desire as long as you're ready to claim it, own it and then follow the actions that are going to allow you to make it come to your fruition. So what would you think are the fears that you've been able to navigate to be able to hold strong in this leadership piece?

Speaker 2:

I think it's about being independent and being proactive in your own mindset, and what I mean by that is making sure that you're doing what you need to do when the time is right. So, for example, this morning I was really tired and I was like, look, I could go and sleep in my bed, I could go and sleep on the sofa. And I chose to go to the spa and sleep on a hotbed there. And I drove for half an hour, went to the spa. I was only at the spa for 40 minutes, read my book, a couple of chapters, had a nap left, came back again. But it was important for me to do that because what it does is it gets me out of my comfort zone. It gets me out of the four walls.

Speaker 2:

Yes, we're very safe in our own properties. You know there are. I could easily finish work, go back on the sofa, watch a load of TV, have a bath, get into bed and then I'm done for the day at 7pm. But I don't enjoy that. I need that drive to go to the spa. I need to spend the time in a spa somewhere around other people. So it's being independent in your own self. It's also knowing what you should be doing and what you shouldn't be doing. So you know that, for example, if you message someone late at night, you might not get a reply, and I know if I've done that, I might have that anxiety all through the night. Have they messaged me back? Have they messaged me back yet? And then I'll overthink, and then I'll spiral, and what I do to overcompensate that is go right, okay, I'm going to meditate and I can't sleep without meditating, but I'll meditate every, every night. It's a Sleep Cove podcast on Spotify and I'll choose whatever theme is relevant to how I'm feeling that day and then I will be in control of my feelings. So I think what undermines all of this, of what we're talking about, is overcoming your fear equals understanding your feelings and knowing what is right and what is wrong, and making sure that you are very conscious of your emotions and allowing yourself to go through the motion.

Speaker 2:

So if you're grieving something, whether it's a job, a relationship, a partner, and whether it's death or just the loss of something a friendship you've got to allow yourself to grieve, you've got to let yourself go through those motions. So you have the highs, you have the lows, but you go on that process of going look, some things are bad and, yes, everything happens for a reason and you can compartmentalize that. And other times, going I'm just really upset or I'm just really angry at the world. Why is it always me? But it always works out for the best.

Speaker 2:

And even if you lose someone through death, there are a lot of lessons that you can take from there. Or and there's a way of also going well, look, they've done their role in the world. There's nothing more they could have given you before they had to pass on to the next life. And it's a way of thinking it and it's a way of compartmentalizing, it's a way of processing it. But if you can be strong on your processing, then everything else will fall into place yeah, and I think so much of that is understanding yourself, isn't it?

Speaker 1:

because your processing works for you. It's not directly translated to anyone else, it's the one that works for you.

Speaker 2:

Um, it will change on each given day as to what you need in those given moments, so, and that's the thing about not comparing yourself to others, and it's so easy to do and it's so easy to look at social media. Go, oh, they're living the best lives and you're going well. What does that mean? Okay, yes, they're on holiday in the Maldives and that's a dream destination, but what have they got going on in their personal life? Because, I'm telling you, it's not what they're putting out there, because people aren't vulnerable, so you're only seeing the best of everything. You never see the other side, and I always think I couldn't deal with a lot of and do you think you've had highs in different ways?

Speaker 2:

I think I have highs daily. I think I'm very, very lucky of what I do. I've created a job for myself 10 years ago that I've molded, and obviously it goes through motions. There's good days, there's bad days, but every job is like that. But on the whole, I have the best job in the world. I eat at the best restaurants in the world. I meet the people that I want to meet. I associate myself, meet the people that I want to meet. I associate myself with the people that I want to associate myself with.

Speaker 2:

I'm very, um, my time is very precious and I'm very, very aware of who I'm spending my time with and who I'm not spending my time with and how long I'm spending my time with them, and I make sure that I'm putting myself first. So, for me, going to a spa each evening, that's me time. I'll only go out for dinner twice a week. I'm not going to go out every week, every day, because I'll just be fat. So I make sure that I've put really high boundaries in place so that I live the best life. For me, um, it's making sure, for example, on Black Friday, that I booked two holidays for next year. So, regardless of whether I'm in a relationship or not. There's one hotel that I've been to eight times. I've booked to go there two more times next year and then, regardless of whatever's going on next year, I know I've got two weeks where I can read eight books and sleep, and that's what I need for me so that I can keep being creative and keep getting those juices flowing.

Speaker 1:

Love it. Let's talk about expectations of self. So a lot of people listening will have high expectations of self, high expectations of other people, and they'll be on the train to burn out because of those kind of parameters. What do you have around yourself in terms of expectation of self? Is it very much linked to feeling good and space and your creativity, or is it linked to other things?

Speaker 2:

I think the expectation I put on what the portrayal of myself is really high. I want to be seen as the guy that is friendly with everyone and I'm friends with the cleaner, the doorman, as much as a big celebrity. I'm also that person that puts the pressure on myself that I'm a people pleaser and I'm a giver and I have to make sure I'm give, give, give, give, give, give, give, give, give, give, give until someone burns out. Now what happens with that is that there becomes a big weakness, which is that I'm too keen because for me I've got to be messaging constantly and I've got to send essays and I've got to send this and, to be honest, a lot of it's down to love languages. If you want to use that as an excuse, is you look at your, your love languages, and there are four love languages. There's the gifts, there's the attention, there's words of affirmation and there's being present and for me and there's physical touch, that's five, and for me I'm physical touch, but I'm also words of affirmation. Now you might be acts of service, so you might be. I'm going to pay for this. I'm going to give you a present once a week, but for me it's messaging 24 7.

Speaker 2:

As soon as I don't get a message, I start questioning things. So I met someone recently and I thought we got on great and there was a mutual communication. We got on great. And the next day I sent a follow-up message and I got a quite blunt reply and I thought, oh my god, everything's gone wrong. And then that person got upset because they were like this is too much, this is too keen, whereas for me I'm going well. I need you to reassure me now.

Speaker 2:

Once I'm reassured and I know where our relationship is and there's a mutual understanding, then I don't need to be reassured every minute. But there's certain times that I need that reassurance because that's what is the insecurity in me of going. I'm not good enough, so you need to make me feel safe. You need to be patient to make me feel safe so that I can ease off. But you've got to understand that and it's why I'm so open when it comes to mental health and emotions and vulnerabilities and insecurities, because unless you understand that, you won't understand why I am the way I am and therefore, how are we ever supposed to grow something together and challenge each other, because you don't really understand me and what my needs are so let's talk about the openness of your you in, like you said, your 32 seeking relationships.

Speaker 1:

These are the kind of um things that crop up in terms of how you live your life and how you spend your time and how you interact and communicate. Do you feel like that is a negative with your relationships? In the past, you feel like that that just puts people off and then they don't come in, or what's the negatives around you being so vulnerable and honest and self-aware? What are the negatives in the relationship space?

Speaker 2:

I think it's the fact that people are so unaware of themselves that it scares them. It scares them that I'm looking to it too much. Um, I'm a journalist and so it sometimes can come across more like an interview than a date. Um, that I am very black and white and I'm a Scorpio and I want to know exactly what's going on at all moments. I want to process it all on a plan at all.

Speaker 2:

I will be looking at a 10-year plan, not a 10-minute plan, and I'm making sure that it's right for me. So before I agree to anything, it has to be right for me. So if you're going through the steps of dating and you're going right, I'll be exclusive. Well, I need to make sure that you've got to that level, that you've met that bar before I start processing that. And I'm not saying, look, I'm going to sleep around with other people. What I'm saying is that I'm going.

Speaker 2:

If we're going to become exclusive, it's because I want to make you my girlfriend soon and it's because I know that you're working towards that. If I feel like well, do you know what? It's lovely seeing you, but it's not going anywhere and I don't see you coming around to my Friday night dinner with my family then I'm not going to make you exclusive yet and then to the boyfriend and girlfriend, then to the husband and wife, like it has to be perfect for me and I know perfection doesn't exist but also I'm very happy in my own company. That's all I'm used to. So for me, if you're coming in, you're there to enhance my life, not detract from it so let's talk about conscious creation and manifestation and trusting things happen for a reason.

Speaker 1:

So before we started this recording, you said you know there's lots of things that have gone on, lots of changes in your life, and you know things always work out. They always do. So talk me through some of the times when life's been tough and then it's just dropped in and it's worked out. Um, and what you take from that.

Speaker 2:

I think it always comes back to the pressures that I put on myself. So, for example, I think the first big hurdle was getting a mortgage as a freelancer, and that was tough. Every bank said no, everyone went we can't help you with this. And you're going well, I'm alone in this, same as now, trying. And you're going well, I'm alone in this same as now, trying to find a job. I'm alone in this. No one's there trying to help me. You know, yeah, people can be there for you. Yeah, people might send a job offer to you, but no one is there holding your hand all the way through it. You are literally isolated and alone on this journey and going. I can't get a mortgage.

Speaker 2:

I've been working for six years. At this point, I'm freelance, I've got a good you know good deposit, and yet I can't do it purely because of the job of a professional I love. Um, I'm not someone who's made to sit behind a desk from 10 to 6 and I'm not someone who works for commission and I'm not someone who can work in HR finance like a lot of my friends. I'm someone who's creative, who's jumping, who's bouncy, who's a networker, who's a schmoozer, and so why am I being disregarded for that, and it also even in day-to-day life, the fact you've got single person tax. You go on holiday, you're paying for two people, even though it's one of you. You go on a cruise I love cruising and, yeah, I'm paying for two people in the cabin and it's literally just for me, so I'm always paying more than everyone else. That's really hard. So to get that mortgage was really hard and that's why I lost my self-belief. Um, it's why I also set up Secure the Insecure as a podcast, so I've now had 305 episodes since that happened. But, um, that was a result of that. Everything happens for a reason. I would never have set up a podcast had I not gone through this mortgage problem.

Speaker 2:

Um, the loss of jobs is always a thing of my jobs that the shows that I produce are very safe. I know what I'm doing. I'm not thinking it's a, it's a routine, but every time I've lost one of those, I've gone on to bigger and better shows and I'm making more things that are more tailored to me, rather than just taking the money, because money is not everything. It doesn't make happiness. It helps, but it doesn't make happiness, um, and it also allows me the space to breathe. You know I don't need to be around people just for the sake of being around people.

Speaker 2:

You know there's one of the benefits of being single is that I don't have to go to families that I don't get on with, and you know all the and first birthday parties, second birthday parties I'm not going to enjoy.

Speaker 2:

Whilst my friends are going to a first birthday party or two on a Saturday, I'm lying in the spa of a book. You know the grass is always green on the other side and it's always funny when you compare and contrast, you go actually, I have got a pretty good life. I think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves, though, that we need to have x amount of savings and those savings, that x keeps growing. So you get to x, then XX, x is XS, and you're like I need two gazillion pounds in savings. I don't know what savings are for, but that's what one would expect to do. One needs to live in a mansion, one needs to have 10 children, one needs to have the big wedding that cost a million pounds, and so I think we're always putting pressure on ourselves to achieve the goal that is so unachievable so let's talk about inner fulfillment.

Speaker 1:

It's a big part of the work that I do, big part of the work you do as well, in terms of being able to manage yourself, your mental well-being, your health and happiness, and being somebody like yourself, where this will be forever moving, changing, evolving, stretching and all other things. What would you say right now, in this moment, as we're coming up to the end of 2024, is like aspects of inner fulfillment for you? So there's definitely the spa and reading. There's definitely some of the stuff that you do, but what else is there?

Speaker 2:

That makes me feel fulfilled. Yeah, going for a dinner with someone for four hours I haven't done that in years. There's probably a couple occasions this year I've done it. But going for those really long dinners, those really long catch-ups, really good, just chatting, mental health and deep diving into conversations and learning something new. You know you never know your friends or partners enough. You can always find out more. So, doing those type of conversations that make you think and pause and cry, love them, absolutely love them.

Speaker 2:

Um, having experiences. I think as you get older you know everything's less materialistic. When it comes to birthday presents, christmas presents, it's not about the physical thing. You know I'm very lucky I can get whatever I want for free more or less books, theater, shows, events, restaurants. But if you're going to take me on an experience like an escape room for an hour, an afternoon tea, anything like that, that, okay, money can buy, but money can't buy as well, is that I'm not going to. I would never put my money towards that. I don't see that as a transaction financially. But if you take me on that experience, then we're being present and I think for me the biggest thing about being fulfilled is being present and I find it so hard to be present, so hard to switch off, to not be picking up my phone every five seconds to look at it, to scroll on social media whilst you're talking to me, because I'm not being present. And when I'm in, when I am present, for example on a holiday, I feel incredible. I feel like I've lost so much baggage that's on my shoulder right now, um and it's.

Speaker 2:

And the other thing is having closures. I think we all have conversations which can go one way or another way. We all have fallings out of people. We're all human, we can't get on with everyone, but when you've got that closure and you've got that true understanding and it doesn't matter when it is that's what fulfillment is, because you've closed that chapter, you're not holding on to anything. I'll give you an example.

Speaker 2:

On my podcast, security and secure, last week I did an interview with a guy called Ian Lee who's a very good broadcaster, been broadcasting for like 30 years and we had a falling out 10 years ago and we haven't spoken and I always thought he hated me. And he came on my podcast last week and I said I just want you to know. I always thought you hated me and he said I'm so, so sorry. I was a bully. Um, he had his demons going on and that's a consequence of that and I went wow, we both had a little cry and we put it and we were even again, and having that closure is so important.

Speaker 2:

There's a lot of people I haven't had the closure with and I've either tried or it's just not. You've not been able to do it because you've been blocked on social media. It's not the right time, but it can make you feel fulfilled Because you want to be the best person possible. No one wants to be nasty, no one wants to be horrible. We all have things going on our lives. We all lash out and it's just having that understanding. Okay, why were you the way you were? Okay, it's because of this. Okay, have you apologized? Yes, okay, let's move on. Done? You know, we've all got an ego, we've all got boundaries and unless you talk about them, you're never going to raise them and know what's going on.

Speaker 1:

I think that's a massive point as we come to the end of the year in terms of people reflecting and closing on all sorts of things, because, energetically, closure can weigh quite heavy. When you want to close something, the person's not there to meet you. It can feel really tough and you have to kind of close it just on your end to be able to move forward. What do you think real closure, uh, leads to in your eyes? So you've closed and you've made peace with things that've gone on, whether they were your, your, um, whether they were part of your journey, their journey or whatever. You've made peace with it. What do you think that opens up in terms of fulfillment?

Speaker 2:

I think it's really interesting. I do this on New Year's Eve every year, so I write a little letter to myself and I reflect on the year and I go month by month and then I voice note a load of my friends and tell them how amazing they are and what our friendship's done this year. That's the positive side. What you're talking about the negative side when it comes to closure is it makes you present in the understanding that you're a good enough person, that you are a person that deserves to be in society, that you're a person that what you're portraying yourself as is true and accurate and that you have a full sense of self-love for yourself, that you don't need to think about yourself negatively, because it's so easy to think of yourself negatively. It it's so easy for a hundred comments to come along and they're all positive and you get one negative comment and you stick to that one negative comment. By having that bit of closure, it just releases that energy that the negative voice is in your head.

Speaker 2:

If you imagine you've got an angel and a devil on your shoulders and I can think of times that I've made mistakes and I haven't had the closure and I've gone. I need that closure to be able to move on, because I'm putting a blockage up, because I'm saying I'm not good enough, because xyz has happened, uh, and therefore you're not going to feel fulfilled. You know the way we look at fulfillment is feeling complete. I don't think we're ever complete, we're ever fully in love with ourselves until we die. I think that's when we've done our job. I think that's when we become completely fulfilled, full circle, because we've done everything and we've put everything to bed. But you've got to die for that to happen, which obviously you don't want to do. But it means there's lots of little chips away at your personality because of experiences that you've gone through in the past that's a really interesting perspective.

Speaker 1:

So let's look, or let's round up and think about what are the things that you know in terms of your future, um, what you may feel is missing where you're going next, bring us up to speed on what are the things that really excite you about what's coming up. What are the things that are coming up that you're like, hey, do you know what? I'm going to get a real kick from that? It's going to fulfill this part of my life, or this part of my life.

Speaker 2:

Oh God, I'm going to have to watch this next year and see if it all comes true. Yeah, it will manifest on the podcast. I'm going to manifest it and it's all going. Said it, charlotte, I'm okay, I'm on, I'm on zero at the moment. Well, I'm not on zero. I had this conversation with I was talking to holly matthews last week about it. Amazing, holly matthews, and she and I said it's life is like snakes and ladders and you go all the way to the bottom. She's like you. You're not on the bottom because you've gone through life experiences and also you've gone through those elements that you're up the road, but let's say snakes. Now, as I've gone down a couple of roads, I'm ready to reset for next year.

Speaker 2:

So still single. I believe that because of my job and I've always worked weekends and I've always worked to the middle of the night, early start. So on weekends, for a year and a half up to October now, I was getting up at 3am on a Saturday and Sunday. So I had no social life on a weekend. No social life on a Friday October now I was getting up at 3am on a Saturday and Sunday. So I had no social life on a weekend. No social life on a Friday night. I was tired all through the week because my body clocks not got used to it and adjusted.

Speaker 2:

So I believe I've got the space now to invest into a relationship. My job, hopefully, when it happens, will be secure so I can then move on to go okay. Well, I've got security there. I can now invest into something else, and the investment would be into a girl. So I'm hoping this time next year I'll have a girlfriend. It will be madly enough. I will be probably gearing up to propose to her the year after. I'm not ready for kids yet, but I probably will be. Then I'll be coming up to 34. So I believe that I'll be in a really good position next year that everything will fall into place with that.

Speaker 2:

With my job I've currently lost a lot of work, uh, which has been hard, but I've processed it. I've got one podcast I'm working on currently. No, I'm not. I've got two podcasts I'm working on currently. I'm developing three others now. I'd like to think that all three of them will be a success. That'll happen. I can then reflect on them in a year time and go look how hard it was to get them off the ground, but look how successful they are right now and mentally I'm hopefully in a really good headspace next year that I've got full of love and not as much anxiety, you know. Uh, I probably had well about five bouts of anxiety questioning me depression levels this year. I'm hoping next year I'll be down to two and then we can keep processing. You've got to go for a couple, but hopefully there won't be five, because that's like every other month and that's quite a lot to go through.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it is, and I mean I'm hoping for none because you can move through that. If you can hold yourself to it, oh it would be. I'm hoping for none because you can move through that.

Speaker 2:

if you can hold yourself, oh, it would be amazing if you had none. Imagine having a year free of money.

Speaker 1:

Come on, we're manifesting the good stuff. We don't have to just reduce the blocks, we can eradicate them. What's a book that you have read? I ask every single guest this what's a book that you have read that kind of has helped you in some part of your life, whether it's mental health, whether it's overcoming fear, whether it's being a leader, whatever it is for you. What's a book that I can share with the readers um, below in the show notes, so they can go and have a look if they've resonated with what you're saying. Actually, that might be a book that I could read when I get some time off well, I've got two only because I haven't actually read one yet.

Speaker 2:

So this is Michael Singer's book, the surrender. Have you read it? Is it good? Yeah, so the first book I want to recommend to you is Michael Singer's the Surrender Experiment, which my friend, bianca Arrigo coaching, gave me after going through my redundancy. She said you need this because it's a journey to perfection and you'll get the self-love for yourself. So that I'm going to recommend. Even I haven't read it yet. The other one is Jay Shetty's Think Like a Monk. Jay is an amazing leader. Okay, he's more of a businessman now, but the quotes he gives in everyday life, the fact of looking at what the other person is thinking.

Speaker 2:

What I loved about this book is that you went on a journey of just questioning everything you do. I do the same walk every morning 10,500 steps, two hours, walk every day, same route, and every day now I notice something different on the route and there's always something. There might be a cone on the floor, a piece of rubbish. I always actively look for something to stay present. I always make my bed every day because, regardless of what's gone on my day, when it comes to reflecting on my day in the spa, I will sit in the steam room for three minutes just before I'm finished the spa session. I go right. What went well today if I haven't got three things? I'm mid my bed. I ate three meals today and that's what Jay taught me. So Jay should actually think like a monk. That's my recommendation for you, charlotte.

Speaker 1:

He is epic and that surrender experiment will be very, very good for you. Um, thank you so, so much for sharing everything that you had. You are a phenomenal human with so much love to give and I really am manifesting with you this woman to come into your life to bring you all of the joy and happiness, but more than that, I'm manifesting like mental health and well-being that feels good for you thank you, charlotte.

Speaker 2:

It's a pleasure joining you today take care.

Speaker 1:

If you want to get a hold of johnny, all of his details will be underneath on the show notes. Um, definitely get in touch with him, see what he's up to. His life's changing every single month at the moment, so it's definitely exciting to see where he goes with everything. So thanks a lot, johnny, and take care of yourself. Thank you, week's episode. I hope that you'reised fearless and inspired to take action today to stand in your greatness. I share even more tools and resources on my I Dare to Leap email newsletter. By signing up, you not only get early access to the I Dare to Leap products and services, but you also get brand new podcast episodes delivered straight to your inbox every Monday, meaning you'll never miss your weekly dose of Becoming Fearless energy. Sign up now at wwwidaretoleapcom. Forward slash newsletter or click the link in the show notes below.

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Charlotte Carter

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